Where Was God?

insanitybytes22

Jan 1

I suspect a lot of people wrestle with the problem of evil and why God allows bad things to happen? I think everyone has to find their own answers to those question and those answers are going to be personal, tailor made to each individual.

I can't offer a pat answer from God or some kind of theological explanation that fits because God is not the one asking the question. He already knows what's going on, we do not. So the question is actually all about us and not about Him at all.

For me, I learned that those questions are not so much about discovering the nature of God, but rather about discovering the nature of myself. I had huge abandonment issues stemming from childhood. The nature of God never changes, He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. I however, have huge wounds, emotions, and traumas that influence my perception of who God is.

So one of the best ways to get answers to one's questions about the problem of evil is to simply go ask Him. That sounds kind of silly but it's very effective. Talk to God in prayer, tell Him how you feel, ask for Him to help you heal and discover the truth about yourself that is keeping you separate from Him. Sometimes it takes a while and lots of asking, discovering, and prayer. Somebody smart once said, "faith is an inside job."

I really enjoy the revelation to be found in Psalm 22. As Jesus is dying on the cross He says, "My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? " I had always thought that meant God had abandoned Him on the cross, turned away from Him in His time of greatest need. I thought, well if He'd do that to His own Son, I want no part of Him. Well, what if Jesus was not accusing God of turning away from Him at all, not lamenting about His own separation and suffering, but rather quoting prophecy? Psalm 22 contains those very same words. It's a Psalm proclaiming victory, mission accomplished, not one declaring abandonment.

I had to change some of my deeply rooted perceptions and preconceived notions in order to understand better and to get to something that was more akin to the truth rather then just a trauma reaction. We tend to be hurt and angry, so we attack or with drawl, accuse God in a retaliatory or vengeful way, rather than trying to listen and understand so as to gain some peace within ourselves.

So those are my thoughts on the first day of 2024. I really wish I could offer some more concrete answers for what can be a really painful subject, "faith is an inside job" and you really need Jesus to help you sort it all out, personally.