The Power of Staying DelusionalSometimes, the only way forward is to believe in a version of yourself that doesn't exist yet.
Would you believe me if I told you that being delusional is what got me this far? It got me through university. It got me through starting a company just months after graduating. It carried me through job application rejections, personal heartbreaks, uncertainties during the pandemic and the quiet panic that comes with building a life from literal scratch. The confidence I walked with—the audacity, even—came from it. So many of my friends have asked how I managed to survive everything I’ve been through, how I kept finding a way to remain calm despite being knocked down so many times. The answer is simple: I stayed delusional. Because sometimes, what we call “delusion” is just a refusal to accept the smallest version of ourselves. In my case, I refused to believe that I wouldn’t be okay. I refused to believe that this—this exhaustion, this waiting, this constant feeling of being behind—was the life I was destined to live forever. I refused to accept that I would always be standing on the sidelines, watching other people live the life I dreamed of, wondering when it would finally be my turn to feel that kind of self-satisfaction. So I chose to believe I could handle things long before I had proof. I believed I was capable before I felt ready. I believed I would be okay, even when nothing around me suggested that I would. On paper, that might sound irrational. But to me, it was survival. There’s a difference between destructive denial and strategic delusion.The first blatantly ignores reality. The second stretches it. One walks through life pretending that nothing is wrong, while the other moves forward with a quiet, “fake it till’ you make it” mentality. One says “nothing is wrong”. The other says, “No—I’m stronger than this”, even when you feel anything but. “Fake it till’ you make it” is such a common phrase, but I didn’t truly understand it until I was in law school. It happened when we were preparing for our first Mock Trials. We had to stand in a simulated courtroom and defend our cases in fictional scenarios. The judge that was going to sit for our trial, however, were very real. The reason for this, according to my professor, was to make us familiar with the pressure of a real courtroom. From the interruptions, the scrutiny to the unpredictability of it all. Public speaking alone already felt daunting to me. The thought of having my arguments challenged or interrupted made it even worse. The key, we were told, was to know the case inside out, stand confidently and never appear nervous. But we were still human. There are emotions you simply cannot switch off, especially when you’re doing something this intimidating. And at the time, I didn’t really have anyone I could confide into about that fear, someone who would genuinely understand it. I still remember one of my classmates raising her hand and asking the question that everyone else was too afraid to say out loud. “What if we can’t help feeling nervous? What if we forget our arguments on the spot?” Wouldn’t that be a nightmare? Our professor simply smirked. “Then fake it till’ you make it,” she said. “Pretend you know exactly what you’re talking about, even if you’re confusing everyone.” After all, she added, in a situation like that, it’s better to say something than to stand there in silence. And since then, I’ve taken that advice to heart. I learned to carry myself with confidence even when I felt anything but. Over time, the more I practiced that mindset, the more I began to believe it. “Say it with confidence, and people will start believing you.”
At first, it felt like an act. A performance. I was simply trying to survive moments that felt bigger than me. But something strange happens when you pretend long enough. The line between pretending and believing begins to blur. Little by little, the confidence stops being something you perform and starts becoming something you possess. Looking back now, I realize that this is what I mean when I say being “delusional” got me this far. It wasn’t about ignoring reality. It was about refusing to let reality define the limits of who I could become. Sometimes, the only way forward is to believe in a version of yourself that doesn’t exist yet. You walk into rooms you don’t feel qualified to be in. You speak with certainty when your hands are shaking. You keep going, even when the evidence around you suggests you should stop. That’s what strategic delusion really is. It’s the quiet decision to believe in your future self before the world gives you any proof that she’s real. Sincerely, Cherie. The Whiffler is free today. But if you enjoyed this post, you can tell The Whiffler that their writing is valuable by pledging a future subscription. You won't be charged unless they enable payments.
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Friday, 13 March 2026
The Power of Staying Delusional
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